MAN IN HEAVEN

A man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St.
Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, "What are all those clocks?"

St. Peter answered, "Those are the Lie-Clocks. Everyone on
Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will
move."

"Oh," said the man. Pointing to one clock he asked, "whose clock is
that?"

"That's Mother Teresa's. The hands never moved, indicating
that she never told a lie."

"Incredible," said the man. "And whose clock is that one?"

St Peter responded. "That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The
hands have moved twice, telling us that Abe told only two lies in his
entire life."

"Where is George W. Bush's clock?" asked the man.
"Bush's clock is in Jesus' office. He's using it as a ceiling fan."